Re-evaluating friendships as year comes to an end

Since I "contracted" tinnitus several years ago, I've been conscious of my stress levels.  The hissing, ringing and whirring seem to elevate under trying circumstances.

So, I'm shedding activities and people who increase my stress levels.

Two "friends" of mine are judgmental, argue in a mean-spirited way, bully and take jabs at me.

I've known both of them a LOOOOONG time and the friendships have been beneficial -- at times. But, maybe it's age but it's getting more exhausting being around them. But, rather than engage, I tread carefully around them so as not to trigger their dark side.  It's my fault that I've tolerated this in the name of friendship. And, in putting up with their crap, I've taken into account how they have helped me. But, how long does one put up with this because of a few moments when they were nice. It seems there is a time stamp on how long you owe someone for a long-ago kindness.

But I 'get' how trying to maneuver around them is as stressful as taking them on.

So, I'm not going to take them into 2022.  I will continue to send birthday cards but I'm going to avoid phone calls, sit down events and having any purposeful contact.

In the end, it's about my well being, health and keeping my stress levels under control.

These two women spike my stress.

I'm too kind of a person to have mean people who are weighted down by their own issues. So, their friendship will be sacrificed in the bigger purpose of managing stress, staying healthy and loving me.  

SO THERE! 

About these old bones

 I just came back from Playa del Carmen and had a ball.

I devoted one day to adventure.  I went on seven courses of ziplines. Then I went on a cave adventure that required walking on rugged and rocky terrain and swimming around stalagtites and stalagmites.

I was exhilarated but my body was aching and my bones were crying.

I like adventure. I love being a daredevil.  And I'm inclined to be a thrill seeker.

But my old bones are saying ENOUGH!  SO, I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG I'LL BE FLYING AND GLIDING!

So, I'll find a way to appease the old bones while continuing to enjoy the adventurous life!

Miss my cat Sheba

Soon after I adopted Sheba, I discovered she had kidney disease.  I knew she was a senior cat but I didn't realize how sick she was.

I complained to the adoption agency and they agreed to take her back.  But I knew she'd probably put her down.  So, I decided to keep her.  Plus the agency was super nice.  They provided me with the expensive kidney food she had to eat.

For 19 months, I gave her love, care and compassion.  I took her to regular appointments to keep her kidney disease in check.  I took her to a groomer to keep her beautiful fur in tact.

But, she was getting worse.  About six months ago,  I started her on a procedure that required that I prick her with a needle and allow water to flow through her.  And, I took her to get several injections.  When it became too expensive, I took her to the low-cost clinic.

Last month, I took her to the vet, who said the disease had progressed.  Around that time, she began puking, pooping and peeing on my rug.  I spent a lot of time on my knees cleaning the mess.  Finally, I covered the rug with plastic and moved the litter box into the dining room so she wouldn't have to go so far.

In the end, I knew it was her time.

So, I had her euthanized.  I was there when she toppled over. And it was over.  She was on her way to the Rainbow Bridge to frolic and play.

I will see her -- and all my pets -- enroute to heaven.  And I look forward to that meeting.

But for now, I miss my cat.

I miss Sheba.

US Open

What a tournament!

The young Brit -- Emma from Britain -- was an astounding story!  Being the first qualifier to win in the tournament's history is a story for the ages.

And following Novak's quest for a Grand Slam was compelling.

Sadly...he lost. And I confess that I wasn't pro Djokovic at first.

But my heart melted when I saw his tears.  And suddenly, my opinion changed and my compassion surfaced.

And, so it was!  It covered so many emotions:  joy, sadness gratitude, heartbreak -- and more!

All wrapped up in one major sporting event

It made my weekend! 

White splotchy spots from the heat

For two weekends, I have been watching tennis in the HOT SUN!  While I was happy that there was no rain forcing play to halt, I didn't know the sun/heat could be so treacherous.

Well, watching a match on Saturday, I glanced at my shoulder and noticed a cluster of protruding white spots!  It was a downright scary sight. Even though I'd applied sunscreen, the sun penetrated that guard rail.  I consulted on-site staff who found it horrible. But, one said she'd had the same issue and that it was a heat rash.

So, I headed home, consulted the Internet and self diagnosed that it was heat rash.

I applied every cream in my medicine cabinet:  CBD Oil, Neosporin, Cocoa Butter -- whatever.  And, I waited for the magic to take hold.

VOILA!

Next day, only trace evidence of the splotches so everything worked.

There's nothing you can do if you put sunscreen on and thought I'd done everything right. But, at least I know that with a combo of creams, the splotch will only last a day.

Tricking the cat

Well, I'm going out of town and putting the cat in a Pet Hotel.  But, I'm putting measures in place that will make transporting little Sheba easier and me catching my plane less taxing.

You see.  Last month, I had to take her to a vet but she was hiding and I had to cancel the appointment.  

I can't cancel my plane.  So, since I don't know all of her hiding places, I'm barricading areas where she MIGHT be and cordoning her off in one central area.

So, with her encased in a certain perimeter, I shouldn't have a problem getting scooping her up, putting her in a carrier, taking her to the Pet Motel and then catching my plane with no problem.  

It's a matter of anticipating a problem and putting a successful plan in place.

Back to my roots!

 Recently, the editor of a publication I wrote for died.  The publisher was distraught as he'd kept the magazine afloat.  I never really liked the publisher but my heart went out to her in her moment of grief.

So, to relieve some of her burden, I offered to write for the publication in the interim.

She accepted my offer graciously.

I wrote my first piece recently.  She loved it and so did the readers.

Last week she gave me another story.  Like the first assignment, I reveled in this second story.  I enjoyed crafting it, refining it, reviewing it, re-refining and submitting.

All totaled, I had about 20 versions I whittled down and rewrote it until it was presentable.

But I felt happy. Joyous. Renewed.

I had returned HOME!

Serena - 24?

 Well, here we go again.

It's Wimbledon time and Serena is trying to win #24 -- AGAIN!

Will she do it?

Well, the intimidation factor is gone, her age is catching up with her, the girls are bigger.

And, she's already given up on competing in the Tokyo Olympics.

So, will she win #24?

One word.

Sadly.

No.

Disappointing French Open

 Well, it's over. And the French Open results turned out to be a yawner.

The women's final was won by a no-name.  Yea, she's known in the tennis world but not a winner who has universal appeal or commercial possibilities.  Just another "ova" although I liked her connection to Jana Novotna and applaud her for mentioning her.

The men's final was predictable after Djoker won the third set.  Although he had two more sets to go, I turned it off.

But I must give him props for coming back from being down.  That's a true warrior and winner.

After this grand slam, it's no surprise that ESPN is no longer going to air the French Open. However, they're sticking with the other three slams.

Even they're done with it.

What time is it? IT'S COCO TIME!

As the French Open inches to the finals, Coco Gauff is emerging as a formidable player and a contender to win the whole thing!

Serena is gone.  Venus is gone.

Time and age are leaving them behind!  The young upstarts no longer fear them.

Coco is 17 and not even at her prime. She is a comer and her path was must be cleared.

It's Coco time! 

Buying a used car? Forget friendship. Do your due diligence

In September 2020, I bought a used car from my trusted mechanic.  I didn't even think about its reliability because of the bond I had with him.

But that was a mistake.

From DAY ONE, I had problems.  I took it back to him twice and then took it elsewhere.  The money output kept going up, Up, UP!

Finally, I decided to take it to the manufacturer.  En route there on the highway, the car began to smoke --heavily.  Cars were honking and frantically alerting me to the danger.

I pulled over and it died.  After waiting nearly two hours for AAA to tow it, I got to the dealer.

The car was dead!  The mechanics had a laundry list of problems with the car. They had pulled up a history on the car and it had been involved in major accidents -- none of which was revealed.To fix it was a down payment on a new car.  

And that's what I did.  Bought a new car.  They gave me a great deal and even included a write-off for the dead car.

I learned an expensive lesson.

Do your due diligence. Forget relationships.  Go with your gut.

Say No if none of its adds up and if you don't feel right.

An expensive lesson but a valuable lesson too.

The "problem" with connecting

 While I enjoy acquiring new friends of the various social media platforms, this can become a problem when someone is trying to solicit you for a ticket,  pitch you to get your insurance from their company and asking you to become one of their clients for _________. You fill in the blank.

I 'get' that it's important to establish connections and promote your enterprise.  But, let's establish a connection without the pitch so I don't feel pitched to.

I am in business and have always waited a decent amount of time before hitting someone up for something I want.  I establish trust and a real relationship.  I invite them to something.

So when connecting -- REALLY CONNECT at the start!

Don't start promoting YOU before embracing your prospect.

Now that's truly connecting!

Let's Get Real About Adam Toledo

There's an uproar about the supposed "murder" of Adam Toledo.  People are even comparing this with the REAL murder of George Floyd and Laquan McDonald.

Here are the REAL facts:

1.    Adam Toledo was hanging out with a 20-year-old known gang banger, with a record.

2.    Adam Toledo was hanging with a known gang banger at 2:30 AM.

3.    Adam Toledo and his gang bangin' buddy were shooting at cars during the wee hours of the morning

4.    Adam Toledo and his buddy's gun-shooting antics prompted 9-1-1 calls from residents

5.    Police responded to those 9-1-1 calls and engaged in a foot chase

6.    Adam Toledo was ordered to stop and show his hands

7.    Adam Toledo opted to continue running down an alley

8.    Adam Toledo stopped and hurriedly ditched the gun that was in his right hand

9.    In a millisecond, Adam Toledo turned toward the officer

10.    The officer had to make a quick decision in that millisecond:  Me dead or him.

11.    The officer fired...and made the right decision.

12.    Horrified, the cop tried to save his life.  Too late.

So, these are the facts.  His mother -- who should have been monitoring her son -- is asking for the officer's head.  Had she been doing her job, this would not have happened.

These. Are. The. Facts.

Quit the emotionalism and let's get real about Adam Toledo.

Army Lt. Caron Nazario - The Outrage

 I want to celebrate the life of Army Lt. Caron Nazario. Why? Because he's lucky to be alive.

These hyped up, pumped up, guns-drawn white officers could have found justification to murder him and accuse him of resisting arrest.

These type of cop/cowboys populate the police departments nationwide. This is the environment that created Derek Chauvin, and so many other killers who murdered blacks. Think George Floyd, Ahmad Arbery, Breonna Taylor, Walter School and so many more who were murdered by cops.

So, this Lieutenant could have been added to the list. It didn't matter that he was in uniform. It did't matter that he was being respectful.

He was Black...but spared.

Now sue them to the rafters and get a big pay day. Appear on TV. Get your props.

You deserve it!

Preparing for a presentation

 Wing it!

Just give them the basics!

I had to resist those words of advice from associates when it came to preparing for an upcoming presentation.

As a person with an acting background, I know the value of rehearsing, preparing, gearing up for the big presentation.

So, I've been practicing, going over the script, gearing up emotionally and getting ready.

I don't want a seat-of-the-pants style.  

I'm going before the group with resolve, conviction and determination.

When I come before this body next week, I'm doing everything I can to present a focused, compelling, convincing pitch.

I'll be ready.

Memory Moments Are Memorable

Yesterday, my sister and I had to go by my parents' house to check on its condition.  As we walked through the various rooms, we recalled moments from childhood.  Every memento evoked a memory of moments with family.  The bedroom we shared.  The little room under the stairs that scared us.  The cubby hole in the furnace room where my brother would escape and meander around the neighborhood.

Filled with memories, we drove around the neighborhood.  We toured past our elementary school, the park where we learned tap dancing, the candy store where we used to buy Mary Janes for a penny.  And, of course, the viaduct under the tracks.  

I took her on a tour of where she lived soon after marrying. She recalled the park where she would take her baby son....now a grown man of 53.

We smiled.  Laughed. Even got quiet as we recalled our parents -- both gone.

Somehow, we got quiet with reflection.  And, in the end, we hugged.  But we also mused on the days we have left because we now are at the age where we must think about life and must resolve to cherish these memories.  Every moment is precious.  EVERY. MOMENT.

Some lemons can't be turned into lemonade

I bought a used 2017 Mitsubishi in August 2020 that had logged only 17,000 miles.  I was super happy to get what I thought was a dream deal.  Plus, my trusted mechanic sold it to me so I didn't think I'd have any problems.  And, if I did, he'd fix it...pronto and for no charge!

But it has been a nightmare.

Soon after I got it, the car began to shake.  I took it back and they "fixed" it.  Then the annoying signal "Service Engine Soon" kept flashing.  Again, I took it back.  They fixed it to the point where the signal stopped.  But a few days later, both the shaking and the signal continued.  

So, I took it back -- AGAIN!  The warning light was off and the shaking stopped.

Three days later, everything was on: The flashing warning light and the shaking.

This time, I took it to another shop, which has a diagnostic device..  They diagnosed it as a carbon build up.

The cost: $1200.

I got it back and everything was beautiful -- for a month.

Then Saturday, the warning light about the engine began flashing again.  I called the new place and they said to bring it back for another diagnostic review.

Yesterday, I was shopping and when I started to go to the next stop, the car wouldn't fire.  I prayed that I wouldn't have to call AAA but after 15 minutes, I got it connected and drove it straight home.

I was talking to my boyfriend and he used the "L" word to describe it:  As in a Lemon.

I wrote my accountant for advice on how to max out the tax advantages on this car because I'm not inclined to spend a lot of money if this car is a lemon.

And, I'll cut my losses if it's determined that this car is a lemon that can't be turned into lemonade.

When Will It End?

 When Trump lost in November, I thought the Trump train had screeched to a halt.  Then came the incessant rants about election fraud and he continued to be in the limelight.

But when Biden was inaugurated, I thought it would end.

But no.  The weak Republicans continue to be tethered to him.  So, my question is?

When will Trump go away?

When will the media stop covering him?

When will we become Trump free?

WHEN WILL IT END?

Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff

 Amid all of the mayhem surrounding the Capitol insurrection there was a major news event that was lost. So, I'll say it loud and proud:

REV. RAPHAEL WARNOCK and JON OSSOFF won their runoffs in Georgia to be United States Senators.

This was historic on so many levels:

Rev. Warnock becomes the first Black from Georgia to be a Senator

Jon Ossoff becomes the first Jew to be a Senator 

The pair held back two competitors who were the incumbents.

The pair emerged the winners despite the ugliest campaign mounted by their opponents.  The two relied on Trumpian tactics -- LIES, DISTORTIONS, FABRICATIONS -- they threw everything out there.  It was toxic...ugly...vile

Trump "campaigned" for them while defiling Republican leaders and airing his own grievances about losing the election.

In the end, the two prevailed. In the end, the two won over the people of Georgia.

Fueled by a massive voter registration and get-out-the-vote offensive, and led by Queen Stacey Abrams, the two got the win.

So, I'll say it...again and again. 

RAPHAEL WARNOCK and JON OSSOFF won their runoffs in Georgia to be United States Senators.

RAPHAEL WARNOCK and JON OSSOFF won their runoffs in Georgia to be United States Senators.

RAPHAEL WARNOCK and JON OSSOFF won their runoffs in Georgia to be United States Senators.

RAPHAEL WARNOCK and JON OSSOFF won their runoffs in Georgia to be United States Senators.

AMEN!