Staying in Touch -- PAYS

In 2013, I worked on a project in San Francisco.  I stayed in touch with some of the major players and thanked everyone who assisted.

Last week, a client asked me to help out with a campaign in the Bay Area.  Because I'd stayed in touch and maintained good relations, I was able to call them up and say "HEY!" and they remembered me.

Most of all, they've agreed to help with this project.

So, staying in touch PAYS off!

I'm so glad I did.

Know Your Value

My sister is a realtor.  Recently, and days before the closing, the client wanted to reduce her commission, they asked her to cut it.

She said "NO!"  Without a beat, she said I know My Value and I will not let you compromise it.

They kept it as it is.

I recall a client pulling the same stunt.  They wanted me to cut my fee and I told them NO.

They paid me my fee.

Sometimes you have to Know Your Value and tell folks so they won't try to reduce it -- and YOU!

And, if they don't want to relent, then move on.  You know your value and that is what's important!

I also am convinced that they will relent, when you stand fast.

Go it alone

People -- especially women -- have a need to run in packs.  If they can't find a friend to go with, they'll stay home.

My advice:  Go it alone!

You can set your own schedule, indulge your curiosity. be free and be open to adventures that you wouldn't have with a friend holding you back.

Many years ago, I wanted to see Red Prysock in Gary.  No one could go with me and I took a chance and went alone.

It was the best experience I ever had.  I met Red and partied with him and his band.  I am convinced that had I gone with one of my less-spirited friends, I'd have never met him.

Ditto last year.  I was in the Grand Canyon and met some wonderful women.  I ended up going with them to Martha's Vineyard and they have become fast friends.  One is a Harvard professor, the other is a buyer for the Rhode Island School of Design.

Both have uplifted me and enhanced my life.  But, it's because I was alone that I had the freedom to explore and meet new friends.

Try it -- and GROW!

Read everything!

To be wired in to all facets of life, you must READ -- EVERYTHING!

I subscribe to the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal.  And that is the upside of my reading range.  But, it's also important to read a daily newspaper, the black newspapers and the tabloids:  National Enquirer, OK, Hello.  I also read Essence, Ebony, Black Enterprise and other national black outlets.

To be even more well rounded, read web sites of those publications to get 24/7 feeds.  Also read Muck Rack, CNN.com, Fox, One America Network -- and more!

If you devour these regularly, you will be able to engage in any conversation, mingle with any network and you will have the satisfaction of being smart, informed, interesting and intriguing.

You are a MAGNET!

A creak on the floor

I recently had a showing for a house I co-own.  I'd gotten a new roof, a new garage, new doors, new floors and overseen a wonderful rehab of this old house.

When I took the prospect on the tour, she was stoic as I listed the many upgrades to this house, that was once considered condemned.

Then, we went to the basement and there was a creak in the corner of a floor.

Suddenly, she went off.  She said the creak was an indication of some structural issues.  She went on a harangue about it and wanted the price dramatically slashed.

I viewed this as an excuse and a red herring.  She looked at me with her demands and I merely reasoned that it was something minor.  But, she was still on a tear and made her offer, which was ridiculous.

I thanked her and wished her well.

I will look into the creak but I won't let a small creak cost me tens of thousands of dollars.

I ain't crazy!

Not outlandish to bill someone for not coming to function

I recently hosted a dinner party for 25 people.  I called everyone a few days before to make sure they were coming so I could get my count right and order adequate food. So, I ordered food for 25.

Five people did not show.  Two called the day of to say there was a sudden death in the family.  I get that. But three others didn't show and didn't call.

So, there was a waste of over 20% and that meant money down the drain.  When I read the news about the bride who sent relatives a bill for not coming to the wedding, I could totally relate.

While I didn't send bills to these no shows/no calls they get something worse:  Not another invitation to anything I have and a downgraded relationship.

SO THERE!

That's why

I host an annual dinner party.  It's always on the last Sunday in September.  Out of five events, only one was cool and that required us to go inside the patio…so there was still an outside feel.  Last year, the last Sunday was beautiful and it was outside and festive.  The following Sunday (the first Sunday in October) was cold.  This year, my event was September 27.  My regular caterer couldn't do it and asked me to have it the first Sunday in October, when she'd be back.  I opted to find another caterer because I couldn't get my head around an October outdoor dinner.  Well, today is the first Sunday in October and it is freezing.  So, things change in a week and this is why I've stuck to my mantra about having it the last Sunday in September.  Oh…and I found a better caterer.  It all works out!

Restoring a friendship -- carefully and cautiously

I am committed to helping a friend who has gone through a ten-year ordeal.  For four years, I had to move myself away from those problems but now that I'm out of that position, we are tip toeing back into the relationship.  Now that I'm out of the Leadership Clutches, I am helping her.  I know she is suspicious but, she had to understand that I could not help her for four years. Even now, I want my involvement private.  So, we are slowly trying to build and restore the friendship while continuing to respect one another.  In my consciousness, I feel I owe her and this is payback time. But, ultimately, it is an act of restoring love.