Merri Dee

Legendary broadcaster Merri Dee passed in her sleep.

I was devastated when I learned the news. No. devastated is too mild a word.

It's a jumble of emotions.  I'm hurt. I feel empty.  I feel spent.

Merri Dee lit up a room with her sheer presence.

Merri Dee lit up Chicago with her philanthropy, her vitality, her smile...HER!

Merri Dee lit my heart with her humanity, her caring, her empathy.

I can't get this out of my head...out of my heart.

She gained automatic entrance to the highest tier of angels.

Goodbye Merri.

I miss my friend.

I loved her!

 

Loretta -- WHY?

So disappointed that former Attorney General Loretta Lynch is defending the NFL against the discrimination suit filed by former Miami Dolphins (now fired) coach Brian Flores.

Why couldn't she have refused?  Why couldn't she have shown solidarity?

This is such a familiar strategy where we are allowed to be used. So, the NFL is being accused of not hiring Black coaches but is hiring a Black lawyer who is willing to be used. 

This will taint her legacy and make a target of shame within the Black community.

But, she's getting paid, I assume, and that, I suppose, is the bottom line.

But, that bottom line is making her reputation hit bottom.

I Discovered -- I HAVE FRIENDS, SORORITY SISTERS AND STRANGERS WILLING TO HELP!

 I'm so used to doing tasks on my own until when someone offers to help, I usually say:  

"Oh, that's OK!  I got this." And then I struggle.

Recently while on Christmas holiday, I checked into my hotel and there was no bellman to help with my bags.  I looked at my tons of luggage and then heard a guy seated in the lobby say, "I'll help!"

I refused to go into my default statement: "Oh, that's OK!  I got this."  Instead I accepted his kindness.  I was so happy and thanked him profusely.

As a mostly solo traveler, I often need help putting my carryon in the bin and assisting in a variety of sundry ways.

But a few days ago I had surgery and I was trying to figure out how I'd manage getting to and from the Surgi-Center, picking up groceries and assisting with my first 24 hours.

My sister, who is too far away to help,  knows I'm independent but she began naming names of friends and sorority sisters admonishing me to CALL THEM! THEY LOVE YOU!

So, I made a list, which kept getting longer and longer and LONGER!

Suddenly, I had friends who spent the night while nursing me, did my shopping, brought food over, cooked and made sure I was comfortable.  One friend offered to fly in.

They lined up to help and I'm humbled and grateful.

I thanked them all profusely and to a person, they said:  THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 HAPPY NEW YEAR!

May 2022 see the end of COVID and its multitude of variants!

I'm tired of masks!

I'm tired of social distancing!

I'm tired of carrying my Proof of Vaccination around with me!

In other words, I'm tired!

So, that is my lone wish for 2022.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Re-evaluating friendships as year comes to an end

Since I "contracted" tinnitus several years ago, I've been conscious of my stress levels.  The hissing, ringing and whirring seem to elevate under trying circumstances.

So, I'm shedding activities and people who increase my stress levels.

Two "friends" of mine are judgmental, argue in a mean-spirited way, bully and take jabs at me.

I've known both of them a LOOOOONG time and the friendships have been beneficial -- at times. But, maybe it's age but it's getting more exhausting being around them. But, rather than engage, I tread carefully around them so as not to trigger their dark side.  It's my fault that I've tolerated this in the name of friendship. And, in putting up with their crap, I've taken into account how they have helped me. But, how long does one put up with this because of a few moments when they were nice. It seems there is a time stamp on how long you owe someone for a long-ago kindness.

But I 'get' how trying to maneuver around them is as stressful as taking them on.

So, I'm not going to take them into 2022.  I will continue to send birthday cards but I'm going to avoid phone calls, sit down events and having any purposeful contact.

In the end, it's about my well being, health and keeping my stress levels under control.

These two women spike my stress.

I'm too kind of a person to have mean people who are weighted down by their own issues. So, their friendship will be sacrificed in the bigger purpose of managing stress, staying healthy and loving me.  

SO THERE! 

About these old bones

 I just came back from Playa del Carmen and had a ball.

I devoted one day to adventure.  I went on seven courses of ziplines. Then I went on a cave adventure that required walking on rugged and rocky terrain and swimming around stalagtites and stalagmites.

I was exhilarated but my body was aching and my bones were crying.

I like adventure. I love being a daredevil.  And I'm inclined to be a thrill seeker.

But my old bones are saying ENOUGH!  SO, I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG I'LL BE FLYING AND GLIDING!

So, I'll find a way to appease the old bones while continuing to enjoy the adventurous life!

Miss my cat Sheba

Soon after I adopted Sheba, I discovered she had kidney disease.  I knew she was a senior cat but I didn't realize how sick she was.

I complained to the adoption agency and they agreed to take her back.  But I knew she'd probably put her down.  So, I decided to keep her.  Plus the agency was super nice.  They provided me with the expensive kidney food she had to eat.

For 19 months, I gave her love, care and compassion.  I took her to regular appointments to keep her kidney disease in check.  I took her to a groomer to keep her beautiful fur in tact.

But, she was getting worse.  About six months ago,  I started her on a procedure that required that I prick her with a needle and allow water to flow through her.  And, I took her to get several injections.  When it became too expensive, I took her to the low-cost clinic.

Last month, I took her to the vet, who said the disease had progressed.  Around that time, she began puking, pooping and peeing on my rug.  I spent a lot of time on my knees cleaning the mess.  Finally, I covered the rug with plastic and moved the litter box into the dining room so she wouldn't have to go so far.

In the end, I knew it was her time.

So, I had her euthanized.  I was there when she toppled over. And it was over.  She was on her way to the Rainbow Bridge to frolic and play.

I will see her -- and all my pets -- enroute to heaven.  And I look forward to that meeting.

But for now, I miss my cat.

I miss Sheba.